Monday, February 7, 2011

The Jitter Girls


Ah, the Jitter Girls.

They’re quite scary, you know. Scary and unstoppable. Or maybe more creepy than scary. But unstoppable. Definitely unstoppable.

I came up with the Jitter Girls as part of a script that never got made. In fact, it was this same script in which I came up with the idea for the Cleavers, as well. That script had a whole load of ideas, but unfortunately it just wasn’t very good. All these madcap ideas didn’t cohere into anything resembling sense, so I abandoned the script and started cannibalising my own stuff, taking what worked and using it somewhere else.

Which is why I’m writing about the Jitter Girls, ten years after coming up with them.

January was, basically, a month writing various short stories and whatnot. I had reached the halfway point of Book Six, and was quite comfortable with taking a few weeks off to get some other work done. Well, now I’m back at it, and I needed a new threat for the middle section and I was searching through this magnificent mind of mine and those creepy ol’ Jitter Girls just jumped right out at me.

I knew I’d get to use them, sooner or later.

I’m not going to tell you much about them, other than that they are currently giving Skulduggery and Valkyrie quite a hard time. I haven’t a clue how they’re going to be defeated, either. The way I’m writing right now, it looks like the Jitter Girls are going to kill our heroes and skip off into the darkness. Which, you know, would be bad for the rest of the book.

Oh dear. I seem to have written myself into a proverbial corner.

I should probably get back to work.


5,000 comments:

1 – 200 of 5000   Newer›   Newest»
Kallista Pendragon said...

1st! YAY!!!
:P

Kallista Pendragon said...

LOL Oh magnificent Derek Landy! Let me say first that I am delighted to read another one of your postings!XDDDD
I just know with your brilliant mind you will come up with a spectacular way for SP and Val to defeat those nasty Jitter Girls!
But I'm tearing out my hair from my head now cause of that teaser you just gave! I'm SO ANXIOUS and EXCITED about reading the next book! I CAN'T WAIT!!!!

*epic scream*
I will try though. With my friends here on the blog, I just might be able to make it through and survive the wait.
Keep up the awesome work Master Derek!
And thank you for giving us another awesome posting!
XDDDDD

Kallista Pendragon said...

Oh! I just want to add that I don't believe you when you say you have no idea how the Jitter Girls will be defeated. I think you do have a few ideas! It will be fun to find out how you do it.

Kallista Pendragon said...

Dang it. I know you said you would not say anything more about the Jitter Girls, but I'm just so CURIOUS!!!!!
What do they look like? Where are they from? What makes them evil?
*sighs*
I have a lot more questions but I have a feeling you won't answer the ones I already asked. :P

Em said...

AWESOME!!
What did your sisters get you for CHristmas? We're DYING to know!

Skyril said...

LOL Sounds like trouble! But, as you've said, a solution will present itself :D Can't WAIT to read about them! They sound quite fun. :] Good luck!

Kallista Pendragon said...

SKyril. If you are still around, I will be back in twenty minutes. :)

Skyril said...

And what a title too! "The Jitter girls" Veeeeeery interesting :)

Skyril said...

Oh, alright, Kallista. I'll likely still be around. :]

Skyril said...

I just finished watching the last episode of the last season of a Robin Hood show. It was an EXTREMELY bitter-sweet ending. Mostly sad. :'[ I mean, happy too, but sad. So this post was a marvelous.... uhhh... thing to read... afterwords... :]

Skyril said...

LOL just wait for word of your new post to spread and there'll be comments galore :P

Saoirse Equus said...

WOW! THis is going to be an interesting book! I'm so excited for it you have no Idea! OH! AND DEREK! I'M GOING TO BE IN LONDON ABOUT A WEEK AFTER THE RELEASE DATE!!! WILL YOU BE ON TOUR!!!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?! PLEASE!?!?!?!?!

Skyril said...

By the way, master Derek, If you ever want to watch a really cool show, there's on called Pushing Daisies that's brilliantly magnificent. Sadly, it got canceled after two seasons, but it's still definitely worth watching. :)

Skyril said...

I'll be back in a bit, I'm gonna go eat some pizza and watch some Superbowl. :]

Kallista Pendragon said...

*pops back in*

OK! I'M BACK!!!!


*does a little tapdance in an empty blog*

adrasdosdark said...

Derek-
Jitters sound crazy. Listen, advive might be EXACTLY what you DONT need, but I have some for you anyway.

If killing them is an issue, then look at all the things they can do. Thanos look at all the thigns they cant do. If one of them is the complete opposite of what they can do, then that could be a weakness.

For example: If I have a character who is invincible. Or inpenetrateable. Well, you can't hurt them from the out side. SO what about killing them from the inside? (poison... Bomb...)

Well, anyway. i just have to say this: You are a GENIUS. i just recently moved from Ireland to America,and I didnt get to buy the fifth book, so I hat to order it. I took about a month anf a half.

Anyway, I'm sure that Skulduggery And Valkyrie are going to somehow kill off the big, badass Jitter Girls. (nice name, by the way).

Good luck, we're rooting you on here in America!

~Adrasdos Dark

Skyril said...

I'm back!

I think I like you, Adrasdos :3

jugglingpaynes said...

My children and I can't wait to read how it all turns out!

Peace and Laughter,
Cristina

Minnie Miracle said...

Yay! Sounds inspired! Their name makes me think of the jitter bug.

Kallista Pendragon said...

Skyril! You still around?
:P

Skyril said...

The first real anime I ever watched when I was a little gil was called "The Cat Returns." :] It was about a girl rescuing a cat from being run over. Well, that cat turns out to be the prince of the cats and, honoring her, he takes her to the kingdom of cats to be his bride. lol I barely remember it, but I do remember that loved it

Skyril said...

Minnie!! I haven't seen you since we got to over 300, forcing Laura to have an interview :D

Skyril said...

Kallista! Yes, I'm still here. :]

Mar-chu said...

I took one look at jitter girls and audomaticly thought of the jitter bugs. Hmm~ maybe the jitter girls are afraid of the jitter bugs~
That would be uber funny!
*gasp*
MASTER! DONT MAKE VALKYRIE DIE! THEN THAT WOULD FORCE ME TO ASK OF YOU TO BRING BACK VALKYRIE AS A SKELETON TOO, AND THAT WOULD JUST BE PLAIN ODD!

Skyril said...

Mmm my mom just made the most delicious blueberry cobbler! Be jealous :P

Skyril said...

Mar-chu!
:)
Hello!

Lizzy the lovely un-dead vampire writer said...

heyyyyyyyyyyy people :)

Kallista Pendragon said...

*sneaks up behind Skyril and snatches the most delicious blueberry cobbler*



*runs off like the dickens and laughs crazily*

Kallista Pendragon said...

*leaps over Lizzy's head as she makes her great excape*
Hiya Lizzy!
>:D

Skyril said...

Lizzy! How are you?

Skyril said...

~gasp~
Kallista! Bring back my cobbler!!

~dashes after her~

Lizzy the lovely un-dead vampire writer said...

Hey Kallista! Hey Skyril!

Alexandre Requiem (Lynda) said...

OH
MY
GAWD.
I'm on the first page.
The first page.
For the FIRST TIME.
Master, I bow to you. *Bows*
I'd like to say something witty, or amazingly intelligent right now in the hopes I will amuse you... but nothing comes to mind.
It's a sad, sad day when your brain refuses to make up nonsense...

You must.
Must.
MUSTARD.
Read... on...
BECAUSEYOUSAIDYOUREADALLTHECOMMENTSTHENIFIPUTMYFANFICUPHEREYOUMUSTREADITNO?
Yeah. This says you must read my fanfic because I'm going to put it up here and you said you read all comments.
So HA.
This is the good one. It's not finished, but trust meh.
'TIS GOOD.
It has no title, so just think of it as "Bloody Irritating Minion five-million-and-one's Fanfic"



The sun rose slowly that morning, as if it wasn’t sure it was worth the effort. The light struggled up the hills and spilled out into the world, overflowing into the the dark city and oozing through the streets.
After a moment or two, a black car with darkly tinted windows pulled around the corner and stopped. The driver clearly loved this car very much, as it was gleaming and in perfect condition. Well, if it hit a dandelion it would fall apart, but apart from that, yes, perfect condition. The door opened and a tall, thin man stepped out, his broad-brimmed hat cocked over his eyes and a scarf wrapped around the lower half of his face, the rest of which was obscured by a pair of abnormally large sunglasses. His dark blue suit was finely tailored, but seemed to almost hang of him. He was an odd sight.
The second door opened and a dark-haired girl around seventeen got out, her equally dark eyes scanning the area. She glanced up at the man and said, “So, this is where we’ll find him?”
Before answering, the man slipped his gloved hand into his jacket pocket and took out a revolver. He confirmed her query with a nod. “Charming place, isn’t it?” he mumbled as he slid six bullets into the gun. He walked without looking where he was going, but never lost his footing.
“Are you being sarcastic, Skulduggery?” the girl asked rhetorically as she followed him.
“Not at all, Valkyrie. I’ve always liked these places. Nice and secluded.” They were approaching the shadow of a chapel.
Valkyrie muttered something about “Idiot,” but Skulduggery responded only by humming pleasantly, as his last name would suggest.
“Who is this guy, anyway?” Valkyrie decided to ask as her partner paced to the grand doors of the chapel and pressed his hands to it.
“He’s a guy.” Skulduggery responded, moving his hands over the wood. “But you should be more worried about—”
“Yeah, I know, what he is, not who. So clue me in then, won’t you, Skul old pal?”
Skulduggery had finished checking the door and murmured with a mouthful of screws in his teeth, “He’s an Adept, and quite a powerful one at that.”
“Name?”
“Alexandre Requiem.”
“Anything else I should know about him?”
“You’re very curious today, Valkyrie. There’re only two things you should know about Alexandre; one, he’s French and bloody impossible to understand, two, he’s standing right behind this door.”

Do you like it? Did you read it?

*Whines*

Skyril said...

~fast forwarding, Kallista and I run around and around in circles and threw doors.~

Kallista Pendragon said...

*easily dodges Skyril while eating some of that most delicious blueberry cobbler*




Mmmmm.....YUMMY!!!!

>:D

Brilliant Night (aka Alex Night) said...

Yay! First 50!

Lizzy the lovely un-dead vampire writer said...

ooooo, very nice fanfic Alex :)

Mar-chu said...

I JUST HAD A AWESOME COMMENT AND I ALL DELETED! WHY CRUEL WORLD! WHY MUST THIS COMPUTER BE SO WEIRD?!?!

(thanks to this computer i may dissappear at ANY time...)

Kallista Pendragon said...

I'm listening to Linkin Park Waiting for the End. :D
AWESOME!!!



*leaps out of Skyril's way and eats more cobbler*

Lizzy the lovely un-dead vampire writer said...

:( that's too bad Mar-chu

Skyril said...

I liked it, Alexandre! :D

Kallista Pendragon said...

Awww...I hope you can stay awhile Mar-chu.

Would you like some of the most delicious blueberry cobbler ever?

Skyril said...

It's so annoying when that happens, Mar!

Kallista Pendragon said...

*sprinkles fairy dust on Lizzy and Skyril's feet so they rise of the ground and hang upside down*
>:D

Brilliant Night (aka Alex Night) said...
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Skyril said...

~blinds kallista and grabs back my most delicious blueberry pie as she stumbles about with her arms outstretched~

Lizzy the lovely un-dead vampire writer said...

weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! *spins around and around while upside down*

Skyril said...

Hey, Night! How are you? I haven't seen you in AGES!

Mar-chu said...

YES KALLISTA!

*grabs cobbler and swollows it whole* *smiles* *eyes water* *leaps at Kallista and hugs her*

I LOVE YOU DUDE!

Skyril said...

My dad is, Night, and I'm overhearing. :] GO Green Packers!

Kallista Pendragon said...

*bumps into Lizzy who is spinning around and knocks herself out*

Brilliant Night (aka Alex Night) said...

Hey, Skyril, I am very good. Happy that Derek finally posted a new post. CHOCOLATE PUDDING!

Lizzy the lovely un-dead vampire writer said...

the packers like cheese, don't they?

Skyril said...

Hey! Now my mom's going to kill you two! Be prepared!
~laughs evilly~

Kallista Pendragon said...

LOL Mar-chu
*hugs her back*

Skyril said...

LOL I'm glad he posted again too! I LOVE it when he posts! :)

Brilliant Night (aka Alex Night) said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Mar-chu said...

*chases after Skyril with a frypan*

MORE COBBLER! MORE!!!

*waves the frypan around like a idiot*

Kallista Pendragon said...

*gives a crazy shriek and runs like heck out of Dereksville Blogland and hides from Syrils's mom*

Brilliant Night (aka Alex Night) said...

You know what I think would be cool for Derek to do? Post a teaser chapter of book 6. That would be awesome. But then I'd probably become even more obsessed, if that's possible, so....

Skyril said...

~shies away from frying pan, having seen Tangled~

Calm down, Mar! Just. Put. Down. The. Frying. Pan.

Skyril said...

Yeah, I think I would go insane and chase after Master Derek, shouting at him to post more of book six whilst he flees, terrified.
Either that, or I would attempt to do that and he would karate chop me and send me to an insane asylum.
One of those two things would likely occur.... :]

Lizzy the lovely un-dead vampire writer said...

uggggg, it takes forever to upload files XP

Brilliant Night (aka Alex Night) said...

Did everyone leave? *looks around suspiciously*

Brilliant Night (aka Alex Night) said...

never mind. my computer's just slow. darn computer.

Skyril said...

I'm still here!!

Brilliant Night (aka Alex Night) said...

and im still here. or am i?...

Mar-chu said...

NO! MAR WANT FOOD!!!

*waves the frypan around*

Skyril said...

LOL I let you off this once, Kallista. I explained to my mother that the cobbler was just soooo delicious, you and Mar-chu couldn't help but eat it all. :]

Skyril said...

Ok, Mar, if I give you some pizza, will you give me the frying pan?

Brilliant Night (aka Alex Night) said...
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Skyril said...

Yeah, lol, you'd probably get sued for everything you have!

Lizzy the lovely un-dead vampire writer said...

night y'all!
Byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

Brilliant Night (aka Alex Night) said...

yeah. im pretty sure the lawyers of a major corporation are really really good.

Mar-chu said...

...No.

*hefts frypan on shoulder*

POTASSIUM!

*Charges*

Brilliant Night (aka Alex Night) said...
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Brilliant Night (aka Alex Night) said...

Ooh, one last thing: derek, I think the idea of the Jitter girls sound cool. they remind me of the evil princess in avatar.

Skyril said...

Yay! The Green Bay Packers won!!

Brilliant Night (aka Alex Night) said...

Bye bye for real now!

Minion Night: signing off

Skyril said...

Oh, Good-night, Lizzy! Sleep well! :]

Skyril said...

Good-night, Night! [LOL good-night, NIGHT ~laughs stupidly~]

Kallista Pendragon said...

*comes back in with blueberry cobbler all over her beautiful face*
Well....It WAS good!

Kallista Pendragon said...

LOL Nothing you do is stupid, Skyril. P

Skyril said...

lol well, thanks, Kallista :]

Kallista Pendragon said...

I got to tell Octa how I feel. :D


I'm relived about that. It was a beautiful thing.

Mar-chu said...

I'm gonna stay on for a really long time! Thats how much i am dedicated to the master! I have endless energy! I am all powerfull! I am-

*colapses*

I am so soo tired. GIMME SOMETHING TO EAT!

(Dang comment wont load...)

Skyril said...

That's really great! :D
I'm so glad you could tell him :)

Skyril said...

LOL ~hands Mar some pizza~

Mar-chu said...

*curls up into a ball and noms pizza softly*

Kallista Pendragon said...

LOL I wish I could stay on too and show how dedicated to Master Derek I am. But I'm so tired right now.
I'm gonna have to leave shortly and get to bed. :P School tomorrow.

Skyril said...

Aw, don't stay up on account of us, Kallista. I have to leave soon anyway. I know how hard it is to do well in school when you're so tired. :]

Skyril said...

Did y'all know that the "sp" in Game Boy Advance SP stands for special?

Mar-chu said...

Yum~

*curls up furthur*

Good night everyone...OH! TROLLS ARE LITTLE CREEPERS! okay. I'm done. Maybe. ORDER! ORDER! ORDER IN THE COURT! okay. Now I'm- DON'T TRUST ARIANA!!!!! now I'm done. Probably. Phhh~

*snores softly*

Skyril said...

I need a whetstone. My knife is getting dull...

Skyril said...

LOL Good-night, Mar-chu! Sleep well! :]

Skyril said...

~absently lights a match, watching the flame flicker~

....I like fire.....

Skyril said...

Ok, I better go. Good-night everybody!
Sleep well, Master Derek!
Farewell for now :]

Kallista Pendragon said...

*pops out of the shadows and blows out Skyril's match.....fades back into the shadows before Skyril knows whats happening*

Kallista Pendragon said...

Night Skyril!

Kallista Pendragon said...

I wanted to stay up a wee bit more. :P

Mar-chu said...

*starts sleep-talking*

Hello Skulduggery, Hello Obi-Wan-Kanobi. How are you doing today? Did you two catch that phycopath in a bunny suit? Oh, you did! Well done~

*is quiet for moment*

OMYGAWD ARIANA HE'S BEHIND YOU! KICK HIM! HE DESERVES IT! DIE BILLY-RAY SANGUINE, DIE!

*quiet*

I KILL YOU! I KILL YOU! YOUR LATE FOR TEA SO I KILL YOU!

*quiet*

Ammy, that freak is just stalling you...bite him~

*quiet*

LA LA LA LAA LAA LAAAA, LAAA LA LA LA LAAAA~

*snores again*

Kallista Pendragon said...

LOL Mar-chu

*gives her a teddy bear to sleep with*

Kallista Pendragon said...

I need more pistachios.

Kallista Pendragon said...

I think I'm having pistachio withdrawls. :o

Kallista Pendragon said...

Hmmmm....Mary Hiashi should be making an appearence soon. :)

Kallista Pendragon said...

Should really go to bed.

Kallista Pendragon said...

But it's nice having the blog all to myself.

Kallista Pendragon said...

OK it's not really...I mean, I LOVE you guys!

Kallista Pendragon said...

:P I need more coke.

Kallista Pendragon said...

*sighs*
I wish I could be part of the SP movie. :/
I would want to play evil people.

Kallista Pendragon said...

I would REALLY love to be Val. But I don't think I could master th eIrish accent. Not to mention I'm several years older then Val is.

Kallista Pendragon said...

I can't wait to see who gets the parts of the movie.

Kallista Pendragon said...

Well, GOODNIGHT everyone. See you all tomorrow! I hope! :P

ulyanak said...

Are the Jitter Girls sisters?
Or twins?
For some reason I imagine them as completely 'opposite' twins.
I think I'm crazy.

Artemis Shakora said...

I'm going to go crazy... screw the break- GET BACK TO WORK!

Rebella Tears said...

will the glitter girls be like witches in left4dead? u come up to the innocent monsters before they attack u? let them take the bait?

Rosella Embers said...
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Jaffa Morbid said...

Yay! You updated! I am sooooo psyched for the next book! Do you have a title for it yet? I know you probably won't read this Mr Landy but could you PLEASE check out my fanfic at http://jaffasreviews.blogspot.com :P
You are AWESOME!

Love from
Jaffa xx

Rosella Embers said...
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Rebella Tears said...

just realized i wrote glitter instead of jitter. wat r they? acrobatic sisters? twins? Fletchers and Ghastlys Past! wats happened? fletchers mum died but wat bout his dad?! and pirates?! wat happened 2 skulduggerys crest? wat bout lord vile? Cealan? wats happening to Caelan? and Billy-Ray? AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! BEST SERIES EVA!!!!!!!!!!!

Rosella Embers said...
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Rosella Embers said...
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Rosella Embers said...
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Rosella Embers said...
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Nyx Dawn said...

YO!


O.O
U

Nyx Dawn said...

Rosella! don't ask so many questions! ur messing with his mind!


>:(


Plus, i can answer no.7! Crux is dead, and China is hidding the murder coz she doesn't want skul-man 2 know that she led his family into ambush.




p.s. ROSEY! Don't go asking our Golden God if he will use u if u don't want other peeps 2 ask aswell! say, people going by the name of Nyx Dawn.......



?

Nyx Dawn said...

p.s. Mr Landy, v Jitter Girls sound COOL!


:D

Nyx Dawn said...

p.p.s. Rosella, Mr. Landy can't look @ ur fanfic before he reads more IMPORTANT people's fanfics...

like mine!


(http://letthesunglasseslive.blogspot.com/)


:D


go on, don't resist the urge 2 c it!

:P

Dragona Pine said...

SOUNDS AWESOME DEREK!

Dragona Pine said...

Anyone on?

Rosella Embers said...

i'm here!

Dragona Pine said...

*uses magic yorkshire pudding to heal Kallista*

Dragona Pine said...

Hi Rosella.

Rosella Embers said...
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Dragona Pine said...

About me and Kallista... what? Having a blog-wedding... yes.



And I do hate name and picture changes, but NAMES MOREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.

Rosella Embers said...

.......

Rosella Embers said...

alrighty!

Rosella Embers said...
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Dragona Pine said...

Why did you ask?

Rosella Embers said...
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Rosella Embers said...
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Rosella Embers said...

i think i should get back to homework...

Dragona Pine said...

*searches for Rosella's Ipod*

Dragona Pine said...

Don't go Rosella!

Rosella Embers said...
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Rosella Embers said...

okay, there it is

Dragona Pine said...

Lol.

Rosella Embers said...
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Dragona Pine said...

I always reply.

Dragona Pine said...

No I haven't seen your Ipod.

Rosella Embers said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Dragona Pine said...

*pats the cute lion cub*


:P

Dragona Pine said...

:P

Dragona Pine said...

:P

Dragona Pine said...

Hmm...

Rosella Embers said...
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Rosella Embers said...
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Dragona Pine said...

*Rosella disintergrates*


Um, sorry about that... anyone who's not allowed to use my magic yorkshire pudding well... disintergrates when they touch it.


AND you need me, if it's hanging above my head then only I can reach it :P


*grabs her Ipod*

Rosella Embers said...
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Rosella Embers said...
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Dragona Pine said...

Aww... :(

Rosella Embers said...
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Dragona Pine said...

*puts her Ipod on the pile of dust which was once Rosella*







*then uses magic yorkshire pudding to heal her*

Rosella Embers said...
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Dragona Pine said...

Aww... bye Rosella :(

Rosella Embers said...
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Dragona Pine said...

No, probably not. Maybe 20 mins I'll still be on, but not half an hour.

Dragona Pine said...

*sighs at his lonliness*

Dragona Pine said...

:(

Rosella Embers said...
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Dragona Pine said...

*sighs*

Dragona Pine said...

Ok, bye Rosella.

Dragona Pine said...

:/

Dragona Pine said...

Hmm...

Dragona Pine said...

Hmm...

Dragona Pine said...

Hmm...

Dragona Pine said...

*sighs*

Rosella Embers said...
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Dragona Pine said...

I have to go now... I'll be on tonight, bye.


*hugs Kallista*

Rosella Embers said...
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Octaboona Ambrosius- Paragon Of The Purple Horde said...

I'm here but I can't stay.

Just wanted to get on first page :D

Bye!

Rosella Embers said...
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